Gonna constantly remind myself that this is just gonna be a phase in my life where I get emotionally attached and unstable. A few years later, I'm gonna look back and sigh in relief cos dog days are over... But for now, I'm gonna keep myself going. Cos nobody likes deranged, nobody likes crazy. I should start getting back onto my feet and do what is best for me. No longer gonna sacrifice shit for people that are not worth my efforts. Gonna have a firm stand on what I want cos right now, my happiness is all that matters. I will keep what makes me happy around and chase away all that negativity that's driving me insane. I'm not gonna let myself turn into someone weak and someone I would abhor. Nope. Not any chance.
I've been really down lately. These few months took quite a toll on me cos all these that I am experiencing were like never before. It's like stepping out of my comfort zone and staying out for far too long for me to handle. I've been wearing and tearing too much. I've lost control of all my emotions. I don't remember myself like that. But it doesn't matter anymore. I hope I can finally say I've really woken up this time round. Don't want to be stucked in this routine where I feel like shit everyday. Not everything's going to go my way, this, I have to accept. It's either I break or I stay as a whole. Gonna drill this into my head, nothing is forever. I need to stop being so stubborn. I need to be more sensible. I need to get my shit together. If I want life to get better, I would've to do something about it.
This is all a part of growing up, I'm growing up. I will grow to become someone wonderful and someone my loved ones would be proud of. Even how bad life seems to be right now, I will occasionally take a moment and thank god that I'm blessed with Angels around me and pretty contradicting, for all the bad I've been through cos they're not gonna break me but instead they're gonna make me stronger.
